Mastering Emotional Reactions
One of the most challenging, yet the most empowering experiences is owing and taking responsibility for our own emotional reactions.
Another Spiritual Psychology skill: By developing the ability to consistently approach ourselves as having choices, rather than as at the effect of others, we both liberate and empower ourselves. It frees us from the self-victimization that comes from blaming others when things “go-wrong” or when we’re “upset.”
When we recognize that emotional upset is a signpost pointing towards unresolved mental and emotional issues in need of healing, we can learn how to relate to ourselves in ways that support us in our healing process. We can disengage from the cycle of emotional reactivity perpetuated by the conditioned response, “I’m upset because…”
By taking 100% responsibility for our emotional reactions and recognizing that our school is in session, we empower ourselves, thereby proving a golden opportunity for healing.
The purposes of mastering this skill:
1. Reminds us that how we relate to the issue is the issue, or how we relate to ourselves while we go through the issue is the issue.
2. Provides an opportunity to take greater dominion within our own consciousness and in our lives.
3. Frees us from the imprisonment and self-oppression that go with judging and blaming others or ourselves.
4. Teaches us that accepting responsibility is a loving action toward ourselves.
5. Encourages us to approach our experiences based on a learning orientation to life, rather than a knee-jerk “I’m upset because” reaction to life.
6. Promotes liberation from self-victimization and opportunities for the experience of authentic empowerment through accepting responsibility for our emotional reactions.
Accepting responsibility for what’s happening inside of us by separating the triggering event (outer event) from our feelings or upset (inner experience) is instrumental in mastering this skill.
An example of this may be: “When my friend said she couldn’t spend Saturday with me due to plans she had previously made, I took it personally and felt rejected. I recognize that her choice was simply the trigger for my unresolved feelings of rejection and abandonment.” This really had nothing at all to do with my friend having a prior commitment.
When you recognize that by accepting responsibility for your inner experience, you take dominion in your own consciousness and empower yourself by moving toward issue resolution and emotional freedom.